Okay, its the end of exams~~~ yeah yeah , i know you know..i just wanna rejoice the fact again. LOL! So anyway, since its the end of exams..we kinda gone high for a while. Last friday, the prefects were playing until we were practically laughing our ass off! Everytime the juniors came into BP, the guys will always scare them, which i could see they were scared outta their wits. haha!
Not really any interesting stuffs happened..but, i got back my results. OMG. IT SUCKS LIKE HELL. here are the results: (drum roll)TADAA! okay, scroll down. =.=
BC:80(its the first time i got an A in 3 years)
BI:82 ONLY.
KH:73(and i was just this CLOSE to getting A!!!)
Science:i dunno..i think i'll pass ONLY)
Maths: I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA.
Sivik: DUNNO.
Moral: GAHH!
Seni: 78.
i forgotten others.
LOL
anyway,gtg. byee! =)
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Thursday, April 8, 2010
When i look at you...
Yeah, its the end of exams. Woohoo!! The taste of freedom is great! Haha.. Well, i'm pretty sure i won't really get REALLY good marks for ANY subjects. Sigh. Wonder how am i gonna face my mom. Uh-oh, i guess she won't half kill me. :( Ahh, but i'm really not in the mood to actually bother about that. Okay, maybe i am, because i just remembered that teacher is probably gonna give back our results today. Oops. Aww man! This is worst than i thought. But like i said, i'm tired of everything. I'm tired of bothering those stuffs that i probably can't handle, but i want to, because it means so much to me. I try to give up, i really tried, but i'm afraid it'll take longer time than my heart to heal. I know time heals it all, but, CAN I? I mean, it really isn't about whether i want or not, its whether i CAN or not.
I know, you'll say this is for the best. And it is, it really is. So i'm not gonna say "i can't live without you" these kind of stupid love thingys. I really don't know why people say that, yeah, it hurts, but it probably won't reach till there.. Or maybe it does. I know, at this time, studies first. I fully grasped the concept,but, its just so hard, everytime i read the old msgs you sent, it makes me feel like crying, but i won't and can't, because i made a promise to sweelynn that i'll be strong, she probably has enough worries to worry about. I don't want to burden her anymore, so i guess i'll just, TRY again. Harder this time. Nothing is impossible. But how?! the feelings are still as strong as it is. I...i don't know what to think anymore. Its not as easy as ABC. And i guess i could say that, this may be the first time i feel the desire to own something. I won't say ''your love is my drug''like Kesha's song, okay, maybe at first its like my habit of waiting for your msg..but, to think it would be all gone, i put my head between my hands and cry. I won't deny the fact that i cried now, because, i'm afraid i would explode like a japanese bomb one day. I would hurt the people i love, and for me, one person getting hurt would be enough.
Maybe its me who think so much, but i can't help wondering, who am i to you? I know you told me the answer, and it isn't what i expected, but, is it true? I mean, i really am starting to wonder what part about me that you like. I'm not pretty, i don't have a model size or height body, i'm not smart. I don't know, you know? Was it all a show? I don't know what to think anymore. I don't know what i'm thinking anymore. Right now, my hands are just moving on their own accord. My mind is positively blank, so it must be my feelings typing these things out. I just Don't want to care anymore. I'm really very tired. I'm tired of cracking my brains to think of things to talk about, of not letting the tension be so thick, i'm tired of pretending nothing is wrong when everything is wrong; i'm tired of saying okay when its totally not. I'm tired of lol , ok, O, then these words! i'm not a robot, please, understand me.
I don't want a relationship, i just want to know that you care for me. I don't want any present for my birthday, i just want to know you're safe everyday. I don't want to talk when we're alone, i want to hear your heartbeat. Its enough for me.
I know, you'll say this is for the best. And it is, it really is. So i'm not gonna say "i can't live without you" these kind of stupid love thingys. I really don't know why people say that, yeah, it hurts, but it probably won't reach till there.. Or maybe it does. I know, at this time, studies first. I fully grasped the concept,but, its just so hard, everytime i read the old msgs you sent, it makes me feel like crying, but i won't and can't, because i made a promise to sweelynn that i'll be strong, she probably has enough worries to worry about. I don't want to burden her anymore, so i guess i'll just, TRY again. Harder this time. Nothing is impossible. But how?! the feelings are still as strong as it is. I...i don't know what to think anymore. Its not as easy as ABC. And i guess i could say that, this may be the first time i feel the desire to own something. I won't say ''your love is my drug''like Kesha's song, okay, maybe at first its like my habit of waiting for your msg..but, to think it would be all gone, i put my head between my hands and cry. I won't deny the fact that i cried now, because, i'm afraid i would explode like a japanese bomb one day. I would hurt the people i love, and for me, one person getting hurt would be enough.
Maybe its me who think so much, but i can't help wondering, who am i to you? I know you told me the answer, and it isn't what i expected, but, is it true? I mean, i really am starting to wonder what part about me that you like. I'm not pretty, i don't have a model size or height body, i'm not smart. I don't know, you know? Was it all a show? I don't know what to think anymore. I don't know what i'm thinking anymore. Right now, my hands are just moving on their own accord. My mind is positively blank, so it must be my feelings typing these things out. I just Don't want to care anymore. I'm really very tired. I'm tired of cracking my brains to think of things to talk about, of not letting the tension be so thick, i'm tired of pretending nothing is wrong when everything is wrong; i'm tired of saying okay when its totally not. I'm tired of lol , ok, O, then these words! i'm not a robot, please, understand me.
I don't want a relationship, i just want to know that you care for me. I don't want any present for my birthday, i just want to know you're safe everyday. I don't want to talk when we're alone, i want to hear your heartbeat. Its enough for me.
When my world is falling apart,
when there's no light to break up the dark,
that's when I , I , I look at you.
When the waves are flooding the shore,
and i can't find my way home anymore,
that's when I , I , I look at you.
Sunday, April 4, 2010
A visit to the hospital.
So while i was studying, mom asked me and sis if we wanted to come along to visit an uncle who was admitted into the hospital. I didn't really want to go because i knew i was weak, i can't really take it. But in the end, i went. It took us quite a long time to reach, cuz we took the wrong turning the first time. So, yeah..we reached. Went up the lift, went to his room. At first, when i walked in the door, i saw an old man, he looked quite strong but he didn't look like how i remembered him. But instead, he pointed to another bed. Surprised, i looked at where he pointed. And then, i saw. I saw my uncle. He had shrinked due to the fact that he couldn't eat as his stomach refuses to take in any food. His skin was all wrinkled up. He slept with his mouth slight opened. I couldn't believe it. No..this can't be happening..i wanted to walk there..but my feet was stucked to the ground, i froze at that spot.
I saw my cousin sister coming in view. She looked weary and she looked haggard. I felt as if someone just squeezed my heart. Everything inside me was churning. I wanted to scream and run away. As if this was a bad nightmare, but it isn't. This uncle, who taught me chinese since i was small, was lying here, in this white room, filled with the smell of anesthetic, on a white bed. I felt tears welling up, but i don't want to cry. No tin front od everyone, and then, my cousin sis woke him up. He looked up and gave me a toothy grin(he lost a few teeth). I smiled back. in my heart, i hope this was really a nightmare. But, i know, no use denying the fact when i know it is true. And then, i smelled ...something.he wetted his pants again. And as soon as they were gettin ready to clean him up, me and my sis walked out. I walked out cuz i didn't want the uncle to feel embarrassed. But my sis couldn't bear the stench. I could, and i would help if i could, but, yeah..its not such a good idea. And while they were cleaning him up, i couldn't bear it any longer. I walked out of the ward, and walked along the corridoors. There, i faced the window and cried. I couldn't believe this was happening. I only hope this is not going to turn out like my cousin bro. I stopped crying whenever somebody passed by. next, i know that crying won't help my cousin sis, i went to the latrine and slashed some water to my face. Smiling at the mirror(LOL!!) i went out. It was the least i could do, being cheerful. Cuz what she needs now is support. And i want to help. So i walked back in with a little skip and hop here and there. But from my sis face, i could tell that she knows i've been crying. But if she knew, she showed no sign of it. And i was grateful for that.
I looked at my cousin sis, she was so weary and haggard. But she still do what a daughter should do. She's taking care of her dad. Suddenly, i felt that, what i've been feeling lately stand no chance to fight with hers. She had to take care of so many things all at once. But me, exam exam and exam. SO what? Exam's not a big deal. I know. SO what if the relationship doesn't work out? But it means a lot to me, So i'm taking back the ''so what if the relationship doesn't work out". but sometimes, i don't know why i struggle so hard. To me, it looks like he doesn't give a damn about it. But i want this to work out, not just end like this. Okay, way out of topic. Ha..um..yeah, that's just about my day. I went home around 8 and just had a hot drink.. chatted for a while..then start studying cuz someone wants to sleep. So i studied around 11 something to 12..then went to sleep. Immediately, i fell asleep. I don't need to toss and turn around for hours only falling asleep.
SO anyway, i have exam today too. LOL. MOm's school is having a holiday, so she went to help out in the hospital. I hope i could go..but, some things are holding me back. EXAMS!!.
BYEE!!=)
I saw my cousin sister coming in view. She looked weary and she looked haggard. I felt as if someone just squeezed my heart. Everything inside me was churning. I wanted to scream and run away. As if this was a bad nightmare, but it isn't. This uncle, who taught me chinese since i was small, was lying here, in this white room, filled with the smell of anesthetic, on a white bed. I felt tears welling up, but i don't want to cry. No tin front od everyone, and then, my cousin sis woke him up. He looked up and gave me a toothy grin(he lost a few teeth). I smiled back. in my heart, i hope this was really a nightmare. But, i know, no use denying the fact when i know it is true. And then, i smelled ...something.he wetted his pants again. And as soon as they were gettin ready to clean him up, me and my sis walked out. I walked out cuz i didn't want the uncle to feel embarrassed. But my sis couldn't bear the stench. I could, and i would help if i could, but, yeah..its not such a good idea. And while they were cleaning him up, i couldn't bear it any longer. I walked out of the ward, and walked along the corridoors. There, i faced the window and cried. I couldn't believe this was happening. I only hope this is not going to turn out like my cousin bro. I stopped crying whenever somebody passed by. next, i know that crying won't help my cousin sis, i went to the latrine and slashed some water to my face. Smiling at the mirror(LOL!!) i went out. It was the least i could do, being cheerful. Cuz what she needs now is support. And i want to help. So i walked back in with a little skip and hop here and there. But from my sis face, i could tell that she knows i've been crying. But if she knew, she showed no sign of it. And i was grateful for that.
I looked at my cousin sis, she was so weary and haggard. But she still do what a daughter should do. She's taking care of her dad. Suddenly, i felt that, what i've been feeling lately stand no chance to fight with hers. She had to take care of so many things all at once. But me, exam exam and exam. SO what? Exam's not a big deal. I know. SO what if the relationship doesn't work out? But it means a lot to me, So i'm taking back the ''so what if the relationship doesn't work out". but sometimes, i don't know why i struggle so hard. To me, it looks like he doesn't give a damn about it. But i want this to work out, not just end like this. Okay, way out of topic. Ha..um..yeah, that's just about my day. I went home around 8 and just had a hot drink.. chatted for a while..then start studying cuz someone wants to sleep. So i studied around 11 something to 12..then went to sleep. Immediately, i fell asleep. I don't need to toss and turn around for hours only falling asleep.
SO anyway, i have exam today too. LOL. MOm's school is having a holiday, so she went to help out in the hospital. I hope i could go..but, some things are holding me back. EXAMS!!.
BYEE!!=)
Saturday, April 3, 2010
April Fool's day. LOL.
yeah, well..i'm kinda busy studying these few days so i didn't exactly blog on the exact day of april fool. LOL. So, today,i was supposed to bring my caligraphy things , but in the end? I forgotten!! OH shit!! Then, while i was on the day to school , somebody asked me, did you bring caligraphy things? And then i was like, OMG!! I didn't bring it!! SHIT!! and everybody heard me saying shit. =.= oops.
then ran into school . yeah, RAN. Found cheeching and asked her, did she bring her caligraphy things? As usual, she didn't. Why as usual? Cuz last year, she never brought except for the last time of exam. LOL. So,she went to buy, and i bought the ink and borrowed the writing pen from SuetZhi. And i thought , problem solved. Oh well, little did i know. So, while we were having exam, i started to write and out of the blue, the head came out of the body. So there were two parts and i was shocked that my mouth opened up. I nearly shouted "HOLY COW" but could do away with the attention, for now. LOL. so i raised my hand and the teacher came , thought i needed more paper, but when i showed her she was like, oh..waddya wanna do? And then i was stunned because she asked..yeah, she's ms yap. not 'somebody'. If its 'somebody', she sure as hell won't give a damn about it. LOL. SO in the end borrowed. When the exam finished, some ppl told me,
WAH!! YOUR PEN PLAY APRIL FOOL WITH YOU AR? HAHAHA...=.=
haha~~very funny. =.= NOT. yeah i know i'm not being a sport, but i was so nervous that it was a wonder i didn't wet my pants at that spot. LOL! Literally...=.=.and then, i'll just skip everything and let's move on to the weekends.
I went to popular due to the fact that my sis wants to buy some books. LOL. As in, revision books. As i was pretty confident about NOT FAILING ANYTHING IN THIS EXAM, i went to look around in the stories section . A few caught my eye but wasn't really feeling the urge to buy them . And then walked walked walked, guess who i saw? WOO CHUN HONG!! OMG!! I quickly hide behind the shelves and suddenly, saw another sentosarian there. OMG..the whole bookstore full of sentosarians!! then, ran to another place and hide..then keep running around like sorpo playing ''catch catch'' sendiri. Syok sendiri. LOL. in the end, came out of ''hiding''. LAWL. and then, went to look at some books again, this time, i saw... NICHOLAS SPARKS series!! I had to use all the strength i had to keep myself from shouting out ''OH MAI GADDD". LOL. a girl gave me a weird look . i glared back at her using a ''what are you looking at'' glare. LOL.=.=. she just walked away. SAD. haha. SO anyway, i practically dragged my mom to have a look at the books, my mom just told me, okay..choose which one you want. And i chose..yeah, how can a mom bare to refuse her own baby daughter...XD. haha..in the end, my sickness came back. I can't make a decision, my mom told me to buy every of his book if i have to, but, i didn't want to buy so much at that time, cuz, i know that i'm gonna neglect my school work and read until i drop . LOL. So, i bought his "Message In A Bottle" and " A Bend In The Road" . And then, i spent so much time choosing the most perfect one, without scratches and stuff, but the worker! SHe just opened the book so big!! I nearly cried at the spot! Yeah, i'm a cry baby. So what? =.= And then, i just walk off..and being in a VERY bad mood on the way home. Mom didn't really talk about it. Until we reached home. MOm was telling dad about what happened and i just cried. Yeah, you heard me right, i just cried. SAt down and cried. Mom and dad comfort me but my sis just said, crazy..==''. I didn't want to talk to her, she always did that to me. LOL. End of story, i can't talk about it anymore, i'll get pissed off again and cry. LOL.
So yeah..that's the end, of the story..=) or blog..=.=.. or post. =.="!
Byee..=]
then ran into school . yeah, RAN. Found cheeching and asked her, did she bring her caligraphy things? As usual, she didn't. Why as usual? Cuz last year, she never brought except for the last time of exam. LOL. So,she went to buy, and i bought the ink and borrowed the writing pen from SuetZhi. And i thought , problem solved. Oh well, little did i know. So, while we were having exam, i started to write and out of the blue, the head came out of the body. So there were two parts and i was shocked that my mouth opened up. I nearly shouted "HOLY COW" but could do away with the attention, for now. LOL. so i raised my hand and the teacher came , thought i needed more paper, but when i showed her she was like, oh..waddya wanna do? And then i was stunned because she asked..yeah, she's ms yap. not 'somebody'. If its 'somebody', she sure as hell won't give a damn about it. LOL. SO in the end borrowed. When the exam finished, some ppl told me,
WAH!! YOUR PEN PLAY APRIL FOOL WITH YOU AR? HAHAHA...=.=
haha~~very funny. =.= NOT. yeah i know i'm not being a sport, but i was so nervous that it was a wonder i didn't wet my pants at that spot. LOL! Literally...=.=.and then, i'll just skip everything and let's move on to the weekends.
I went to popular due to the fact that my sis wants to buy some books. LOL. As in, revision books. As i was pretty confident about NOT FAILING ANYTHING IN THIS EXAM, i went to look around in the stories section . A few caught my eye but wasn't really feeling the urge to buy them . And then walked walked walked, guess who i saw? WOO CHUN HONG!! OMG!! I quickly hide behind the shelves and suddenly, saw another sentosarian there. OMG..the whole bookstore full of sentosarians!! then, ran to another place and hide..then keep running around like sorpo playing ''catch catch'' sendiri. Syok sendiri. LOL. in the end, came out of ''hiding''. LAWL. and then, went to look at some books again, this time, i saw... NICHOLAS SPARKS series!! I had to use all the strength i had to keep myself from shouting out ''OH MAI GADDD". LOL. a girl gave me a weird look . i glared back at her using a ''what are you looking at'' glare. LOL.=.=. she just walked away. SAD. haha. SO anyway, i practically dragged my mom to have a look at the books, my mom just told me, okay..choose which one you want. And i chose..yeah, how can a mom bare to refuse her own baby daughter...XD. haha..in the end, my sickness came back. I can't make a decision, my mom told me to buy every of his book if i have to, but, i didn't want to buy so much at that time, cuz, i know that i'm gonna neglect my school work and read until i drop . LOL. So, i bought his "Message In A Bottle" and " A Bend In The Road" . And then, i spent so much time choosing the most perfect one, without scratches and stuff, but the worker! SHe just opened the book so big!! I nearly cried at the spot! Yeah, i'm a cry baby. So what? =.= And then, i just walk off..and being in a VERY bad mood on the way home. Mom didn't really talk about it. Until we reached home. MOm was telling dad about what happened and i just cried. Yeah, you heard me right, i just cried. SAt down and cried. Mom and dad comfort me but my sis just said, crazy..==''. I didn't want to talk to her, she always did that to me. LOL. End of story, i can't talk about it anymore, i'll get pissed off again and cry. LOL.
So yeah..that's the end, of the story..=) or blog..=.=.. or post. =.="!
Byee..=]
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Exams.. are driving me nuts. Gahh.
Okay, first, i'm gonna apologize for leaving moi blog dead without 2 seconds notice. LOL. Nah, i'm just kidding. So anyway , took advantage to online this morning as I felt it was a really good day to online (despite the fact that i have to memorise the stupid moral nilai's) so anyway, um..i'll just start with what happened yesterday , okay.. so.. we had chinese paper 1 and moral yesterday . Skip skip skip.. we finished chinese exam (FINALLY!) yeah, well..i'm not gonna say I THINK i'm gonna fail..cuz i probably won't , the least is i'll get "not-very-good-marks" that's all. LOL. And so it rained during recess, no need tugas SR, tugas kelas, but where i go? Pergi cari kawan pula. SO chatted with chee ching and phuiyeng, then pulled a trick on siao suan. It went like this , she walked past me , so i just slapped her butt , then she turned but she can't see anyone, and by chance, yuen chang yoong walked past. You guys should have really seen their expression , the way their expression change is priceless. OMG!! I was laughing like hell and yuen chang yoong was busy explaining that it wasn't him that did it. OMg!! It was so funny!! And then, there was no eletricity. Walao..i was on the edge on losing my temper.. Yeah, i don't know why, but everytime i come back from tugas, very hot, no wind? I feel like standing up and getting on ppl's nerve, LOL. So anyway, i keep telling myself心静自然凉. But, apparently, it doesn't do much help. GAhh.
So i tried to calm myself by reading "Dear John" instead of the stupid moral nilai's that might probably set me off and i'll just explode. LOL. Yeah, it did help. Amamzing what books can do , huh? MOving on, while i was indulged in reading this fascinating book, (=.=) the person in front of me(yeo kee gim) turned and told me ,
yeo: 应该不用考试了。
me: 琢磨？
yeo: 都没有电。
me: 吓？！！酱都给你讲到！
yeo: 是嘛，看老师手上都没有考卷。。。
me: 是咩？你不要逃避现实啦。。现在暴风雨他都要你坐在这边考啦！
yeo: 不懂哦，希望不要囖。。。
me: *LMAO！！
In the end, still need to exam. Gahh.. "don't avoid the truth larh." LOL. anyway, finished this, he turned and told me again,
yeo: 希望现在有电啦。。很热哩。。
me: OMG，好希望不希望，现在希望有电？好笑，你不希望我们考试的时候有电不是跟好？咋 到！
yeo: 哦，酱希望明天啦。。。
me: *甘拜下风。。
LOL.don't know if today we're gonna have to take exam . Haha! Just kidding, even if there's an earthquake, i'll bet they still want us to menduduki exam . GAhh!!
So i tried to calm myself by reading "Dear John" instead of the stupid moral nilai's that might probably set me off and i'll just explode. LOL. Yeah, it did help. Amamzing what books can do , huh? MOving on, while i was indulged in reading this fascinating book, (=.=) the person in front of me(yeo kee gim) turned and told me ,
yeo: 应该不用考试了。
me: 琢磨？
yeo: 都没有电。
me: 吓？！！酱都给你讲到！
yeo: 是嘛，看老师手上都没有考卷。。。
me: 是咩？你不要逃避现实啦。。现在暴风雨他都要你坐在这边考啦！
yeo: 不懂哦，希望不要囖。。。
me: *LMAO！！
In the end, still need to exam. Gahh.. "don't avoid the truth larh." LOL. anyway, finished this, he turned and told me again,
yeo: 希望现在有电啦。。很热哩。。
me: OMG，好希望不希望，现在希望有电？好笑，你不希望我们考试的时候有电不是跟好？咋 到！
yeo: 哦，酱希望明天啦。。。
me: *甘拜下风。。
LOL.don't know if today we're gonna have to take exam . Haha! Just kidding, even if there's an earthquake, i'll bet they still want us to menduduki exam . GAhh!!
Friday, March 26, 2010
List of movies...lawl.
Yea yea yea, i'm here to blog again..
No no no, its not gonna be an emo post..
At least, its gonna be a list of movies i plan to watch.
Hmm..
No no no, its not gonna be an emo post..
At least, its gonna be a list of movies i plan to watch.
Hmm..
- Valentine's day
- Alice in Wonderland
- The lovely bones
- Sherlock Holmes(yeah, i know its a long time ago movie, so what?)
- Alvin and the Chipmunks The squeekuel
- Dear John
- The Last Song
- Harry potter and the Deathly Hallows
- Eclipse *screams and faints
- ....still waiting to fill in... LOL.
Omg omg..i seriously can't wait to watch these movies..I think if think anymore i really don't need to have exam already. LOL. Totally obsessed with movies man..LOL.
Anyway, anyone wanna teman me watch all these movies?? Haha..i'm just kidding. Of cos i need to watch with my friends lurhh.. watch those romantic movie with my parents, later in cinema watch halfway pull me out. LOL. Say, under 18 cannot watch .=.= zadao... So, i gotta go now! =) byee!!
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Dear John...
Dear John, tell me everything, write it all down. That way ,we'll be with each other all the time even if we're not with each other at all...its a full moon here tonight which makes me think of you.Dear John...i miss you so much that it hurts.
Yeap, this is from the movie Dear John based on Nicholas Sparks novel. Omgg, i can't wait for this movie. I think its coming out soon..(at least,i hope so)..=.=
Yeap, this is from the movie Dear John based on Nicholas Sparks novel. Omgg, i can't wait for this movie. I think its coming out soon..(at least,i hope so)..=.=
Just a short post, cuz i'm bored.
Seriously, i mean.. i know that exams are coming, but..
HOW THE HELL DO I STUDY IT?!!
omg..i feel like jumping off a cliff. LOL. JUst kidding.
Gahh...
What do you mean to me?
I finally know the answer.
You mean everything to me.
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