So while i was studying, mom asked me and sis if we wanted to come along to visit an uncle who was admitted into the hospital. I didn't really want to go because i knew i was weak, i can't really take it. But in the end, i went. It took us quite a long time to reach, cuz we took the wrong turning the first time. So, yeah..we reached. Went up the lift, went to his room. At first, when i walked in the door, i saw an old man, he looked quite strong but he didn't look like how i remembered him. But instead, he pointed to another bed. Surprised, i looked at where he pointed. And then, i saw. I saw my uncle. He had shrinked due to the fact that he couldn't eat as his stomach refuses to take in any food. His skin was all wrinkled up. He slept with his mouth slight opened. I couldn't believe it. No..this can't be happening..i wanted to walk there..but my feet was stucked to the ground, i froze at that spot.
I saw my cousin sister coming in view. She looked weary and she looked haggard. I felt as if someone just squeezed my heart. Everything inside me was churning. I wanted to scream and run away. As if this was a bad nightmare, but it isn't. This uncle, who taught me chinese since i was small, was lying here, in this white room, filled with the smell of anesthetic, on a white bed. I felt tears welling up, but i don't want to cry. No tin front od everyone, and then, my cousin sis woke him up. He looked up and gave me a toothy grin(he lost a few teeth). I smiled back. in my heart, i hope this was really a nightmare. But, i know, no use denying the fact when i know it is true. And then, i smelled ...something.he wetted his pants again. And as soon as they were gettin ready to clean him up, me and my sis walked out. I walked out cuz i didn't want the uncle to feel embarrassed. But my sis couldn't bear the stench. I could, and i would help if i could, but, yeah..its not such a good idea. And while they were cleaning him up, i couldn't bear it any longer. I walked out of the ward, and walked along the corridoors. There, i faced the window and cried. I couldn't believe this was happening. I only hope this is not going to turn out like my cousin bro. I stopped crying whenever somebody passed by. next, i know that crying won't help my cousin sis, i went to the latrine and slashed some water to my face. Smiling at the mirror(LOL!!) i went out. It was the least i could do, being cheerful. Cuz what she needs now is support. And i want to help. So i walked back in with a little skip and hop here and there. But from my sis face, i could tell that she knows i've been crying. But if she knew, she showed no sign of it. And i was grateful for that.
I looked at my cousin sis, she was so weary and haggard. But she still do what a daughter should do. She's taking care of her dad. Suddenly, i felt that, what i've been feeling lately stand no chance to fight with hers. She had to take care of so many things all at once. But me, exam exam and exam. SO what? Exam's not a big deal. I know. SO what if the relationship doesn't work out? But it means a lot to me, So i'm taking back the ''so what if the relationship doesn't work out". but sometimes, i don't know why i struggle so hard. To me, it looks like he doesn't give a damn about it. But i want this to work out, not just end like this. Okay, way out of topic. Ha..um..yeah, that's just about my day. I went home around 8 and just had a hot drink.. chatted for a while..then start studying cuz someone wants to sleep. So i studied around 11 something to 12..then went to sleep. Immediately, i fell asleep. I don't need to toss and turn around for hours only falling asleep.
SO anyway, i have exam today too. LOL. MOm's school is having a holiday, so she went to help out in the hospital. I hope i could go..but, some things are holding me back. EXAMS!!.
BYEE!!=)
